Dreaming of Supernatural Significant Others

Over on Facebook, my girlfriends and I are all giddy for the fact a full Breaking Dawn Part 1 trailer is now available.  Well, to be honest, I began the giddy fest. With my squeal soon ensued other squeals of glory and conversation followed. What was the topic?  The supernatural mate. Those men folk of pages gone to small or large screen that are just too delicious to deny. Whether a woman considers herself a  collector  of “literature” over common fantastic fodder or boldly holds up her collection of paranormal romance, urban fantasy, and a few Harlequin $3.00 errors (admit it, you went for the hotness on the cover, not the content) the one universal appeal next to a strong heroine getting the job done is the shadow covered,  mysterious man of the hour that makes her go soft in the knees. Hell, or a man making a man weak or a woman making a woman weak for that matter! The supernatural mate captivates the attention.  Admit it ladies and gents. Descriptions containing the solitary corner soul or the bold entrant are enhanced when they include smoldering eyes of different shades, muscles, and skin depicting an evident species difference from the average Joe.Or the solid, lithe, hour glass body most of us Jane’s don’t carry.  Since the days of myths and legends, both sexes have had the advantage of being personified in the ultimate deity desire format.

One of my favorite aspects of the supernatural is the other-worldly qualities that call attention back to the basic instinct of every being  to seek out companionship. Two is better than one. The most ardent and alleged-created-to-be-alone entity has a world changing experience when romance comes alongside trials by fire.  The very real qualities of perseverance, dedication, and selflessness for a loved one become tangible words you can touch in the pages of a book  (or the glow of your e-reader).  Toss it all in with a plot usually centered around theft, murder, and world domination and we’re in for a good time!

Below is the result of our comment box chatter. One of the ladies specified how Twilight had ruined her for life.  In the new teaser trailer for Breaking Dawn, there is a snippet of the consummation ala Edward breaking the board because he’s experiencing the Bella.  Where was her broken headboard, she said?   Where was her dark hero who would go through anything and anybody to be with her and whisk her away towards a situation to lead to said headboard’s annihilation?  While our significant others may stage a revolt because they are not any variety of our favorite vampires/werebeasts/gods/demons etc. for those of us who get lucky enough to get in the way of a significant other in our paranormal listings, here is an open letter to our future sweethearts:

Dear Significant Other:

I consider myself a practical woman, very modern for the times. I can hold down a job, am educated, and have taken full advantage of the post-feminist induction. While I have roared as a woman, sometimes I do like to purr. With assistance. This is where you come on. Yes, I need you for something:

Be amazed, be stunned, then be appeased. I am one of the many women who don’t think you are inconsequential as a sex, and if you are of the same sex, I’m not closed minded. However..

I do have a few..requests..

1.) If I want my bodice ripped off, oblige. Seriously, I mean if I am telling you to rip something, why the hell would you say no? This also goes with pants, dresses, shirts, stockings, etc. No doubt if you are supernatural you are either already rich or a really talented asassin person who can buy me more. This is where reciprocity comes in. I give you love, a life mate, and dinner, you give me that Calvin Klein dress. Just sayin’.

2.) If you have any supernatural genetics or tendencies, this is very much okay with me. The modern era is pretty fantastic, and while you may not glitter like diamonds as per some modern vampires, if you burn we’ll get you the best SPF and umbrella for day walks. If you can’t go out during the day, that’s fine. I’ll reverse my sleep schedule. You can make me a snack, but not dinner, okay? Feel free to eat any of your exes however, or the whore down the block. Don’t bring home anything to me, though. If you give me anything, I’ll stake you.

3.) If you are of a more animal persuasion, this is also okay. Just..don’t pee around the house, okay? Marking the furniture or me in this way is so not sexy. However, mating rituals are fine. Bonding. Life lines. Psychic connections. Increased libido. Imprinting, etc.

4.) Breaking objects in passionate rages is fine. Breaking them because your pissed is so not. My mother gave us that vase.

5.) Being supernatural doesn’t free you from household chores, but you can do them shirtless if you like. In tight pants too. Yes. Or in nothing for that matter, because I don’t mind. 

6.) Please don’t let any of your other family/friends/enemies/pack/dude who gives you magic tools down the street mess up the house on polker night. Just sayin.

I am sure you will have your own basic desires such as some solitude for full moon howls, that you not be relegated to a stereotypical coffin, or that request shields, materials, objects be included or avoided in our home. Diet requests are easy to accommodate. Illegal activity for the common good despite it being illegal is allowed.  Just remember I don’t share well with others, and whoever else tries to get in on the action will find that I was a good shot with a gun long before I had reason to defend our home from your collective no-good enemies.  I also keep the requisite amount of witches, spell casters, and more if you get out of line.

Sincerely,

Your Sweetie

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2 thoughts on “Dreaming of Supernatural Significant Others

  1. Completely and utterly brilliant! Loved the letter, and though mentally my mind listed a few things I’d include, you definitely hit so many good points spot on! Especially the whole don’t share/play well with others deal haha. Great blog and definitely worth waiting for!

    (also I fully admit I soo have my share of romance novels..and more than a few of the supernatural ones lol)

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